the most wonderful daydream
being close to inconsequential
just one of the pals
but you can depend on her
and you like to spend time with her
go out for a raucous evening
dolled up and grinning and comfy
she talks to strangers and you
big network of loose acquaintances
always someone to fill up space
but there’s always the core few
and they’re meaningless in the world
she’s just getting along
everyone’s just getting along
not struggling, but not soaring
it’s so inconsequential
it can’t be the most wonderful
Poetry
I’m working on writing a thousand poems. I started in April 2015.
Poem #89
12 boxes
a dresser
a bed
4 bins
and panic
Poem #88
I feel normal
I am human
my life is a collection of moments
I smile
I cry
I grit my teeth
I jump
I lie motionless
I exist
and it doesn’t seem to be that different on a basic level
I don’t feel normal
I talk, but too much
I tell the truth, but too much
I expect, but too much
I’m careful, but not enough
and there’s more that I can cover up
when discussing the differences
everyone says they do that too
cover up the same differences
we don’t seem to be that different on a basic level
Poem #87
eyes closed
side by side
heavy soft bass
not awake or asleep
100% content
Poem #86
it’s weird to know it
it’s weird to know this
this thing since I was little
it’s over, it’s decided
but it doesn’t feel triumphant
because there’s so much more left
Poem #85
five fingers tapping on a couch cushion
the nerves in hand unaware of the brain
just tap, tap, tap is what they’re told
the endless march eventually ends
press the buttons on the remote
it’s a new task, and the old never existed
the pressing is endless and forever
the firm squish of plastic is all there is
until lifting the popcorn is everything
Poem #84
a girl with beautiful blue eyes
sits solitary in a rowboat
she’s been waiting two hours
one hour past when he said
he still hasn’t shown up
she wrings her fingers
her eyes are watery
but she refuses to blink
the water laps at the sides
she remains motionless
even as noises tempt her
another hour passes
she knows he isn’t coming
but waiting was a testimony
her legs ache and shake
as she walks away alone
Poem #83
cool head
thought out
deliberate action
it’s admirable
I have a new protagonist
Poem #82
everyone touched my toes
figuring out an old rhyme
I felt like a kid again
Poem #81
needles and teeth
wind in and around
running, screaming
hold it up to the light
don’t breathe
count to five
hold up a flare
pearls and claws
