loud voices
happy eyes
hyper hands
all or nothing
no subtlety

tip toe through the state
a beautiful sky
good conversation
mildly weird
oddly normal
nice time
introspection
and complete

I say these things
so they don’t stay inside
and fester and kill me

“what’s my name?”
I ask to re-establish
I’m a real person

young boy with a wide brimmed hat
climbs to the top of his favorite tree
he surveys the view and smiles
his hand slips and he slips to the ground

stare at the ceiling
and don’t think
don’t sigh
don’t blink
disconnect from it
no link
the body is temporary
the mind sinks
into the abyss
not to drink
float there
just shrink

heaviness in my brain
calm subtle joy

pastel fluff
dark wire
amorphous blob
geometric patterns
perfection

a cocoon of artificial heat
dark gray sky before sunrise
red and yellow lights everywhere
the world is lively before it wakes